A journal

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Thursday, September 29, 2011

Home alone+Twins in cloth diapers=frustration

Ugh.  okay so the boys are almost 5 weeks old now.  Since we got home, we have been cloth diapering the kiddos in Kissaluvs terry size zero diapers, with a couple of little joeys microfleece All-in-ones.  So about 2 weeks in, Greyson started developing a rash.  I though it probably was a result of urine scalding and/or ammonia buildup.  So i started using some cloth-diaper friendly balms, california baby and angel baby bottom balm.  They didn't seem to help and the rash/redness continued.   I also felt that maybe we were putting the diapers on too tightly causing the redness around his legs.  We started diapering him on the largest setting of the terry diapers, but still saw redness around his legs. So after another week i switched him into disposables left over from the hospital and started with the butt paste, great for rashes but killer on cloth diapers.  We then purchased some larger size Rumparooz pocket diapers (fleecy inside with microfiber inserts) to alternate with the sposies/butt paste combo.  I though that perhaps the terry diapers were holding the urine too close to the skin (even though we changed the diapers every 2-3 hours) and that the fleece would draw the moisture away from the skin.  We didn't use the butt paste with the pocket diapers, but somehow the fleece started repelling moisture, causing crazy leaks.  I think this happened by cross contamination of the butt paste from the cloth wipes we had used to clean up his butt when he was in sposies.  UGH.  I tried stripping them (several scrubs and washes with Dawn liquid detergent then copious rinses in hot water) to no avail.  At this point the rash had sorta cleared up so I switched him back into the terry diapers because I didn't have any more energy to work cleaning up the fleece diapers.  At this point John had to go on a three day work trip, which is not uncommon for him.  And of course the redness came back.  So what to do?  I ordered some Funk Rock detergent to try to rid the terry diapers of ammonia buildup but i was (am) exhausted with doing laundry and trying to keep two boys happy, fed, and dry by myself. everyone says "sleep when they sleep."  Uh yeah so who is going to do the laundry, the dishes, make me eat something heathy, make me take a shower, walk and feed the dogs, run errands and take the kids to the doctor for vaccinations?  Right - so no wonder I am exhausted and my wrists hurt from bottle feeding and my back hurts from hoisting up my 9 and 11lb children and sleeping in 1 hour increments on the couch with the kids in their boppys.  The doctor says "do you have help?"  Sure i do.  But I am not going to ask my mother or sister to do all the middle of the night feedings.  Everyone works so they can't help during the day.  So, no, not to really when my husband travels.  And to boot I feel like a mommy failure when the pediatrician examines the boys during their 1 month wellness appt and they both have redness in the groin area.  Hey mommy guilt!  SO i have decided that I need to maybe go disposable when john is traveling.  I just can't do all the laundry and expect to be able to do everything else.  AND nap during the day.  So today I bought two Gdiapers (medium, 13-28lbs)  from whole foods with some flushable/disposable inserts and Earths Balance regular disposables.  Just put G in the Gdiapers and J in the regular disposables. My first impression of the gdiaper is that because it is a sized diaper, the leg holes aren't nearly as tight on G's fat legs, so maybe this will reduce the redness.  With the liner that will draw moisture away from his skin, maybe it will completely clear up his redness.  AND since its disposable, I can use whatever diaper creams I want without fear of wrecking the diapers.  I hope it can contain his crazy amt of pee.  We'll see in another hour or so.

My family says "do what you can do" so that is what I am doing.  Something had to give and it's the crazy laundry esp when i am home alone.    We'll see how it goes.  :)

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

today's adjectives

sleep-deprived, stinky, moist, discombobulated, disheveled, disarrayed,

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Dear babies,
Last night was the first night I spent alone with you.  Daddy had to travel for work and your Mamaw had to go home to Pittsburgh.  I was cautiously optimistic that we would survive the night.  I don't function so well on no sleep.  But you boys were GREAT.  You both ate well and went back to sleep quickly.  Me and the dogs spent the night on the couch and you slept together in the pack and play. I developed the ability to feed and burp two infants at the same time. And we all are doing great today.  Thank you for being the best kids a mom could ask for.  Love, Mom.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Sorry babies, the milk machine is closed

I am writing this to apologize to you, Jack and Greyson, for not being able to continue to feed you breast milk.  I really gave it the old college try, pumping for the first three weeks of your precious lives but I just couldn't do it anymore.  It really hurts and with your daddy going back to work I just don't have the time to pump to get enough milk to feed you both.  I hope that in the future you don't have allergies or other horrible diseases because I didn't breastfeed you longer.  I did however switch you to organic formula in your third week courtesy of your Auntie Laura who turned me on to using organic baby formula.  I hope you have grown up strong and healthy and your Dad and I have tried to give you the best start to life that we possibly could.  Love you madly - Mom.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

I heart Craigslist

Almost anyone I talk to probably already knows that I love craigslist.  It's like a giant garage sale in cyberspace. I love a bargain and I am sure that is a trait passed down from my grandparents who grew up during the depression (yes, they even saved christmas wrapping paper!) and my mother who is the queen of bargain hunting.  You can find pretty much anything on craigslist and I have gotten a ton of stuff over the years, even roommates when I was living in an apartment in Allston MA.  So when we started shopping for the kids, I pretty much checked craigslist for all the big stuff.  We needed a ton of stuff and here are the things we got:
one new crib and unused mattress
a snap and go double stroller 40$ (retail 85$)
a regular side by side double stroller 175$ (2010 model retails for 370$)
a changing table 125$
a glider and ottoman 75$
a breast pump and accessories 35$ (Medela In style retails for 300$)

And I plan on selling stuff as we rotate the kids' things out as they outgrow them.  I love the continuum of baby stuff, simply because most stuff you use for such a short period of time.  Love it!!!

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Cloth Diapers. Why not?

So when we were in the process of getting pregnant we started to think about cloth diapering.  I was pretty ignorant about the subject as I think a lot of people are, especially we children of the 70's who grew up in prefolds, getting stuck with diaper pins and wearing plastic pants.  I happened to have a friend at the time who had cloth diapered her two children and I was curious.  How much do they cost?  How do you handle poop?  Well after a bit of research I stumbled upon the Diaper Lab website.  Turns out there is a whole STORE devoted to cloth diapers - and it was in Somerville - only 5 minutes away from my work!    So one day we took off during lunch and visited the store.  WOW!  Who knew there were so many cool options - prefolds, all-in-ones, pocket diapers, one-sizes. Fleece, organic cotton,  bamboo velour, microfiber, wool!  And the prints - too precious for words!!  I thought to myself that this would be awesome - we can save a bunch of money in the long run and do our part to not add to the landfills.  I was sold, but how would i convince the hubby?  There had to be something besides just the money issue.  They were essentially just as easy as disposables ("sposies" in diapering lingo).  I knew where his hangup would be (and frankly, mine as well) and that was the issue of poop.  What do you do with the poop?  After having multiple dogs for so many years we have had our share of picking up poop.  Gross.  You never get used to it.  Okay here was the saving grace - newborn poop of breastfeed and formula fed babies is water soluble.  That means you don't have to remove it before the dipes go right into the washing machine.  AWESOME.  That gives us several  months to get used to 1. having multiple kids, and 2. having to change upwards of 24 diapers a day before we have to deal with plopping poop into the toilet.  Nice.  The hubby was sold.  We took a class to learn about all the options and other diapering accessories.  I started reading mommy blogs about cloth diapers and all the schools of thought on which brands are best esp for newborns, how to launder and what types of detergent to use and not use, diaper creams that are cloth diaper approved etc.  So that was that.  By another friend I was turned to cloth diaper rentals which seemed like a great option for the newborn phase because they would grow out of them so quickly.  So we ended up renting 30 of the Kissaluvs Kissas size 0 with about 9 covers (mix of snaps and velcro).  Now, we just needed to add babies!!

Monday, September 12, 2011

Sept 11, 10 years later

So yesterday was September 11.  It was a Sunday and a beautiful day at that.  10 years ago I was at work at Biogen in Kendall Sq in Cambridge.  I was probably setting up an experiment.  My friend Jorge was already in the lab as well and our friend Beth was down the hall listening to NPR.  At a quarter to 9 the first airplane hit one of the twin towers in NYC.  There was confusion - someone reported on the radio that thought they saw a red dot on the plane - was it a Japanese plane??  I don't really remember what all we did next but i do remember that they set up TV feeds i the cafeteria and auditorium.  It was dark and people were stunned to watch the tower on fire.  And then the second plane hit.  Still hushed confusion.  Were we under attack?  From whom?? OMG my boyfriend is working in down town Boston.  Will they evacuate?  Is he okay?  Are we ok?  Finally got a hold of John. Yes they are going to evacuate his building at Charles River Plaza.  Hope he can get home - mass evacs clog the roads and trains.  Should i go home to my apartment in Allston? Or should we stay put and figure out what is going on? I decide to stay put and we watch the rest of the events unfold on TV: pentagon, pennsylvania, towers falling.  It was amazing and I will never forget.  To this day I can't watch any of the footage.  I can't watch any of the made for TV movies or specials about that day - even the ones about heroes.  It was my generation's President Kennedy Assassination.  We'll always remember where we were, and we'll Never Forget.  9/11/2001

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Starting a BLOG

Well, it's the hip thing to do, right? Start a blog when something momentous happens in your life? Ok, well then, CHECK!! I am a former scientist who just welcomed two beautiful baby boys about 2 weeks ago. My whole professional life has been devoted to the scientific method - testing a hypothesis and backing up conclusions with data. So when my hubby and I started to TTC (trying to conceive for those uninitiated to the IVF lingo: oh, IVF = in vitro fertilization) and things weren't working out so well, we went the scientific route. Get a lot of lab tests, gets all sorts of invasive procedures, look at the data, read scientific papers, figure out WHAT and WHY things weren't happening. Then, take it to the next level: Surgery. Will that fix everything? Well maybe not. More tests and labs and TIME. Then it was time to do the ultimate in vitro experiment: IVF. eggs harvested and fertilized. We saw our potential babies for the first time in a petri dish. How sterile and scientific but OMG we LOVE these 8 and 10 cell embryos already. In they go and then wait. The dreaded TWW (two week wait) for a pregnancy test. I spent the majority of it in St Croix on vacation with my sister, drinking virgin pina coladas, snorkeling and taking in the island flora. It was the ultimate way to relax. And then, BOOM. I get back tot he States and I am PREGNANT! WEEHOO!! That was easy (well, not so much). And now 9 months later I have two sweet beautiful babies and I am sitting here pumping and blogging. My life has changed and I am so ready to get on with: Experiment MOM.


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